Casual Heroing

Chapter 61: [Lover]

Chapter 61: [Lover]

So, people are annoying. As a general rule, we dont like strangers. Its a fact. Elves dont like Humans. Humans dont like Elves. If you are blonde, you dont like brunette. If you are brunette, you dont like blonde. We dont like different people. This is our premise, you two.

I sat them both down at a table while I go on with my lesson.Follow current novels at novelhall.com)

So, women will rarely like you at first. They are not like us. We look at a woman and thats it. We are lowly, filthy beasts. We are hunters who starved for three days and three nights while looking for any sign of life in a forest. So, whether we find a rat or a deer, we dont care. We gotta eat.

I slam my palm on the table to make the point clearer.

I have to say Im impressed they are both listening to me with such attention. Especially Lucillus. Its clear that the guy is interested in Flaminia much more than he wants me to know.

Instead, women are like do you two know what a shark is?

They look confused.

Is the sea close to Amorium? I ask.

They shake their heads.

And here goes my beautiful simile.

Ok, lets just say women are apex predators. We are scavengers desperate for food. Women can pretty much have their pick whenever and however they want. And most women are lazy. The most a woman needs to flirt with a man is a smile. If a man only smiles at women, he will probably never get laid in his entire life. Its not a fair game, remember. So, when a woman says no to you, there is a chance shes just saying no to the entire man-kind.

The [Enchanter] guy, Claudius, actually whips out a piece of parchment and starts writing on it at incredible speed.

I look at their confused eyes and decide to close the lesson here.

They just lost me there.

Oh man, the curse of knowledge. I know too much to explain every single detail in the best possible way.

Ok, listen. First lesson, just remember the fundamentals. Compliments are good, but dont exaggerate. If the women have the same reaction that Lucillus had when I complimented him, pull back; theres no hope there.

I should probably have the [Lover] class, or whatever they had told me there was. Maybe it was [Flirt]?

Who knows.

Claudius, care to show me the Rune?

The man is going over his dating notes when my question catches him by surprise. He probably forgot for a moment that he came here to work and not to listen to a dating seminar.

Oh, right. Sure. Come.

He carefully puts away the parchment he was writing on. I saw him work with what looked like expensive reagents and whatnot and he hadnt been nearly as attentive as now.

This guy must have some serious lady-problems.

Well, worry not. Ill help you, my friend.

As long as you provide me with a discount on this and all future Runes, obviously.